Pronouns masterpost

So you're confused about pronouns? What are they, who uses them, and why do some of them look like totally made up words??

Well, most people use pronouns. They're a way of referring to a person that tends to be shorter than using their name, making it ideal to use in textual and verbal communication, but unfortunately tend to imply the person's gender. The most common pronouns are he/him/his, she/her/hers, and they/them/theirs, but there are actually so many more.

If you're cis, you've probably never thought about the implications of pronouns because people have been referring to you as he/him or she/her all your life and it's just natural to you. However, for many trans and non-binary people, pronouns can bring about a damaging sense of dysphoria due to the genders they imply. They thus may change pronouns. If this happens, they expect people to use those pronouns to refer to them. 

Spivak pronouns are a set of pronouns designed to be gender neutral in a way he/him and she/hers aren't. They may not seem "real", but they are as real as any other pronouns and may be extremely important to one's identity. Examples of spivak pronouns include ey/eir, ze/hir, xe/xir, among others. People may choose spivak pronouns above they/them because some spivak pronouns sound more feminine or masculine without being inherently feminine or masculine and retaining that sense of gender neutrality, or simply because they prefer the way the pronouns flow with their name and being better than they/them.

Noun pronouns are exactly what they sound like, they are nouns people have converted to pronouns, typically used by otherkin but free for use by all. Examples of noun pronouns can be bun/buns/bunself, sun/suns/sunself, flower/flower/flowerself, among many many others. These pronouns are just as legitimate as traditional and spivak pronouns. 

HERE ARE SOME COMMON PRONOUNS (but not all of them):

He/him/his/himself

• He is going to school. those shoes belong to him. I am going to his house. he loves himself
  Typically attributed to males but can be used by non-binary people as well. He/him gives off a sense of masculinity but they are not "male" pronouns. 

They/them/their/themselves

• They are going to school. Those shoes belong to them. I am going to their house. they love themselves
  Typically, people designate they/them as a plural pronoun, only to be used for groups of people and never one person. However, the singular they/them has existed since Shakespearean times and has only recently been frowned upon in English classes. They/them is the perfect gender neutral pronoun, perhaps the most gender neutral one could possibly get

Xe/xem/xir/xemself

• Xe is going to school. Those shoes are for xem. I am going to xir house.  Xe loves xemself
  Pronounced zee/zem/zer/zem-self. Sometimes alternated as xe/xem/xyr/xemself. 

IMPORTANT: these are not 'preferred' pronouns. They are simply pronouns. These are not the pronouns people prefer to be called, they are the pronouns they NEED to be called, just as cis people need to be called he/him and she/hers. You cannot choose whether to use someone's pronouns no matter how ridiculous you think they are. These pronouns are essential to trans and non-binary identities and to deny them these pronouns is to deny them their existence. Please be respectful.