everyone kept saying i looked upset today

and like what I wasn't upset

like everyone kept saying I looked upset
like I was "pissed off and taking it out on everyone, or like you're about to cry"

and like
wtf
how
like

I wasn't necessarily sad??
like I wasn't reall yhappy either
but it was more of an apathetic dull feeling than a sad one
like I was kinda having an off day but I wasn't really sad
and I didn't think my face reflected sadness like wtf it was literally just like a straight face??

and I kept saying
no this is just my normal face
my neutral face
this is what I look like when i'm not smiliing
you're just so used to seeing me like really bouncy and full of energy
and today I don't really have any

and my coworker went " how long have you been here now and this is the first time I've seen you like this"

no it isn't???
literally this is just me not being all oVERLY SMILEY
like
what the heck just??

this is what I was scared of like
being so smiley and happy happy all the time
the one day i'm not
everyone thinks something is wrong with me
like god I don't feel like doing anything
I don't have the energy
i'm bored and tired and sleepy and i'm not enjoying myself

i'm annoying when i'm my usual happy self and i'm sad when i'm neutral
lolok